Welcome to the World, Baby Girl

What a lovely, peaceful weekend! The only thing missing was church. We went out-of-town for the day and had to miss church. Good thing God knows where I am all the time and goes along for the rides. Went to Peg's yesterday to celebrate Delaney's birthday. God, thank you for blessing me with such a loving mother-in-law; Peg's home is a place of rest and refuge from the busy world. She cooked some good groceries and we ate 'til it was almost shameful...almost! The chocolate birthday cake she made, with old-fashioned boiled chocolate icing, was so good it made my teeth ache. I bore the pain and decided to have a second piece. It was a little bittersweet as yesterday was "Grandy Bo Harold's" birthday. Losing him 9 years ago was so difficult and we miss him still. We have comfort in knowing we will one day see Grandy Bo again when we meet our Heavenly Daddy. "Bad Bo" would have laughed at Peg, his nephew Jason and me yesterday plucking freshly killed doves and pulling their breasts out. Thank goodness we had at least the sense God promised a goat and proceeded with the operation outside because the feathers flew, honey! To be such tiny little things, dressing those doves is a messy undertaking (pun intended). Bo would have enjoyed the fellowship afterwards as we sat on the porch, rockin' and talkin'. You can solve the problems of the world given enough time rockin' and talkin' on a porch. I love rocking chairs so much I have one in my classroom; reading to my class while I rock is such a joy!

I fell in love with rocking chairs when my baby girl came along. Delaney Elizabeth "Scout" Remsen was born September 7,1993 at 9:10 p.m. She took her sweet time getting here and right before she made her appearance, we had a scare that she might not make it to this side of heaven. But God's plan was for her to meet the world. He saved her. And He saved me.

Jesus saved me in every way He can save a person. He saved me for Himself and from myself. He saved me to love, serve and worship Him. He saved me from a life of rebellion; from pain without hope or comfort; from trying to fill a God-shaped vacuum in my heart with everything BUT God. He saved me to show me what my parents taught me, that there was a better life out there with Him as my Guide. Do I enjoy a perfect life of constant bliss? Not a chance! He never said I wouldn't fall, that I wouldn't hurt, that happiness would be my constant companion; He said He would always be there. He said this life is a vapor and that life on the other side would be bliss. Like the Bridegroom He is, God will be there for better or worse; He does honor His vows; death will not separate us but will unite us. He also saved me to be Scout's mommy.

When Bill and I were dating and things seemed altar-bound, I had to tell him that biological children were probably not an option. I told him all about endometriosis (more than he wanted to know, truth be told) and my prognosis. When I then told him about my probable infertility, he paused only to take a deep breath and say "Well, if my Grandmother Lottie can do it so can I. I can love someone else's child as my own. Let's look into adoption." What? We had not even set a date but Bill knew his mind and heart. His grandmother married at 19 and instantly had 5 step-children. She went on to have 2 biological children. One would never know the difference in her love and care for those 7 children. She loved them all ...and at times wanted to pinch each and every one of their heads completely off!

Subsequently, Bill experienced my numerous trips to the doctor's office; accompanying me on trips to the emergency room; supporting me through a surgery...all before "I do." Bill doesn't scare easily and he doesn't run from adversity. He even had the pleasure of seeing me after my wisdom teeth were extracted; can you say "chipmunk on Demerol?!" My hormones were out-of-whack, as opposed to in-whack, and at 28 I was experiencing hot flashes, crying jags and gained 40 pounds. Oh yes, it was a formula for relationship success, honey! I felt like a Lifetime disease-of-the-week movie, without the sexy wardrobe and perfect teeth.

In November of 1993, two years after I married, I had a routine test come back as suspicious for cervical cancer. It was devastating. We had tried since our honeymoon to have a baby. Forget home improvement projects, we were on a mission!! We were trying to be fruitful and multiply; the fruitful part we had down pat; it was the multiplying we were having trouble with. (I never have been great at math.) My mother, the undisputed head cheerleader for lost causes everywhere, refused to believe it was God's plan for me to have cancer. She believed I would have a baby. That is NOT what I wanted to hear. I thought she was absolutely nuts and I think I told her that. Then again, maybe not because I still have all of my teeth! I was angry with God, so hurt and I made no attempt to hide my feelings. Constantly, for 2 years I questioned Him, "Why is it that there are women who don't even want children pop them out like peanuts, one after the other, but I couldn't even have one that is the deepest desire of my heart?!" If one more of my well-meaning friends and relatives had told me "God has a plan" it was highly-possible this blog would be coming to you from a women's prison. I was ready to burn down the next person who smiled and lilted one of those Sunday School sayings my way. Then, as Gomer Pyle would say, "Surprise, surprise, surprise" a biopsy revealed the previous test to be a false-positive. And three weeks after that, I found out I was pregnant. Okay, okay I know, God did have a plan. Delaney Elizabeth was on her way.

You have never seen a woman who was 1 month pregnant try so hard to look like she was showing! I went straight from Dr. Oldham's office to the mall to buy maternity clothes. I was wearing them before nightfall. I was walking so bent back I looked like a sway-backed mule . I did get some strange looks. It seems so ridiculous now but honey I was so happy to be at the multiplying stage that I wanted everyone to know it. By the time I was 6 months along I no longer had to fake that sway-backed mule look. I was in high cotton in those days, beyond thrilled to be a mommy-to-be. Even the eventual swollen feet and general discomfort were a blessing to me. God not only gave me the desire of my heart, He gave me the ability to chose the joy in every aspect of it. "...for the joy set before Him, He endured the cross..." (Hebrews 12:2) The joy of the cross? Who am I NOT to find the joy in each situation? I didn't feel happy about some of the pain and difficulty but I did choose the joy of the situation. I chose joy at knowing the things I was feeling were because I was carrying a promise coming to fruition; joy that if these discomforts didn't exist I wouldn't be receiving this blessing; joy at knowing that a beautiful miracle awaited me at the end.

In my prayers, I had promised God that if He gave me a baby I would raise that child to know Him. Just like Hannah gave Samuel to God as she promised, Bill and I have given Delaney over to Him. Delaney has such a heart for God and His service. She loves church, her youth group, service projects, Bible studies...all aspects of praise, service and worship are where her heart lies. How blessed we are to have a daughter like Delaney, not perfect but who has a daily walk with a perfect Savior. Welcome to the world, Baby Girl!

Love to all y'all!