Thoughts about Daddy

Time does get away from me - hard to believe I haven't written anything since last Thursday.

Spent most of the day Friday @ University Hospital with Mama. She had a little cosmetic surgery as a follow-up to her double mastectomy procedure; no reconstruction was her choice but she needed a bit of refinement of her skin. Teri & Dennis (sis & b-in-law) there, too. Honey, Mama held court in that day surgery building! From the time Mama hit the door downstairs, to wheeling out after her procedure, she was a 4'11" tornado of Southern charm and Christian faith! It was more like a party going on in her room than awaiting, and recovering from, surgery. Amazing grace indeed! I went home with her afterwards and we watched every make-over show TLC airs. She was up before me Saturday morning, though neither of us beat the chickens awake. My sweet hubby kept the home fires burning and took care of supper, etc Saturday night. Thankful to Laura & Ben for taking Scout to Greenbrier in time for her to catch the band bus to the ball game @ Evans. Thank you, Lord, for the little things family & friends are willing to do that make life easier.

If Daddy were alive, he and Mama would celebrate their 62nd wedding anniversary today. They were about 7 weeks shy of 60 years when God called Daddy home suddenly on July 4, 2007. While it makes me sad, I choose the joy in the situation; joy at the beautiful, loving, Biblical picture of marriage that I witnessed; joy at knowing he was loved enough on this side of heaven by a wife who was a helpmate, friend, partner, sister in Christ; loved enough by 4 girls who used to fight over who got his cigar band and who would put on his slippers (were we crazy or what?!); joy at having not just a father, but a daddy. I had a daddy who came home every night; a daddy who played board games with us on Saturday nights (and did NOT let us win, either); a daddy who believed in his 4 girls and never doubted we could do anything; a daddy who showed us how we should be treated by a husband. Daddy lived, "Jesus first, wife second, children third" then church, work etc. He said if one honored the first 3 that the rest of one's list/life would fall into the proper priority. Daddy was an encourager to so many, pushing them to believe in themselves. My daddy was not perfect and we saw that, too. But he walked daily with a perfect Savior. I choose the joy in all of the wonderful stories people shared with my mama, sisters and me at Daddy's visitation and funeral; the joy in knowing he quietly encouraged and assisted so many people - some I knew about, many I did not. Daddy wanted people to believe in their abilities- and that they were absolutely God's gift- and wanted them to follow whatever was God's plan for them. Daddy wanted everyone to see the love he had for his wife and daughters, sons-in-law, grandchildren, siblings, scads of nieces, etc. Rev. Joey Thompson preached Daddy's funeral and after my sisters and I finished (each) sharing our thoughts about Daddy, the first thing Joey said was, "After that, if you have the urge to hug your wife and children, please go ahead and do so now." Daddy wasn't rich nor famous but our home church seats about 800-1000 downstairs and the church was filled. Every walk of life was represented because Daddy did not offer his friendship to position but to people.

There are days I miss Daddy so deeply that it physically hurts; my heart is brimming and feels as though it could burst. How blessed I am that there were no unspoken words between us. I wasted so many years being rebellious. For many years we were like 2 raccoons tied up in a sack and thrown in the river; we were in it together but we sure didn't like it and fought like the devil to get away from each other!

But once I was again on the right path and putting God first, Daddy and I spent many happy hours together. He never allowed the past to cloud our present or future. He absolutely and completely forgave me. Daddy was an earthly picture of a Heavenly Daddy.

I love you and miss you, Daddy. I know I will see you again. Keep the porch light on until I get home!

Love to all y'all!

Randomness on a Thursday

Today was a good day in the preschool neighborhood; almost no tears and that was just Mrs. Ann and me. We enjoyed learning more about our class through their "All About Me" bags. Very interesting to learn what books they enjoy and particularly their career aspirations. For the girls it was a toss-up between doctor - not nurse, doctor- mommy and princess. And since I have 3 sisters who are nurses, save the cards and letters and understand that I believe nursing is a wonderful profession for women AND men. The boys surprised us the most; "horse cleaner-upper, chef, and 2 farmers were among the expected firefighters and policemen. The "horse excrement specialist" (sounds funnier than groomer, folks) has a sister who loves horses so he figures to literally do the dirty work for her! That's right, sistah, get him young and train him right.

Rachel came home from school with me today because her mama, Crystal, wasn't feeling well. (She & her husband, Steve are very close friends of ours.) That child is a woman trapped in a preschoolers body, honey. In a pinch I think she could drive. We ran errands and she navigated Wally World like a pro. I should just send her in with the list and money, grab a "Co-cola" and sit on one of those benches, and let her have at it. She's a 3-foot dynamo fueled by juice boxes and PB&J. We took a 12-pack of Cokes to school for Delaney for ball game band breaks. It was at dismissal and there were teenagers everywhere. It was organized chaos and Rachel just waltzed in holding my hand and strolling along like she owned the joint. Hilarious!!! (By the way, if I haven't explained this for those who need one, "Co-Cola" is a Coke in the South. And when we ask "Do you want a Coke?" that is shorthand for "Would you like a carbonated beverage?" Should be Coke, but may be Pepsi, Dr. Pepper, the Dew, etc.

It was "cook's choice" tonight and the cook chose frozen pizza. Since Scout considers me a great cook I wasn't sure if that would make the cut for her - since. if you read a previous blog you know, her nickname for me is "MacGyver of the kitchen." The doubt was unfounded because she jumped on the pizza like a starvin' man on a country ham! You would have thought I had cooked a 7-course meal. What was I thinking? Teenagers are as uncomplicated when it comes to food as are men - it's dead, it's cooked and it won't eat them first. Bill and I joke that too many wives think husbands are more complicated than they are. He and I agree that to please her husband, a wife just needs to get nekked, have a bucket of hot wings and it's all good! A ball game later of some sort would be a welcome bonus.

Mama is having some minor plastic surgery tomorrow. She had a double-mastectomy in February and the surgeon needs to remove some excess skin. Dr. Duggan was able to remove all the cancer and Mama didn't have to have chemo or radiation. Praise God for the good things He has done. Praying Mama sails through this procedure as well as she did the initial surgery; amazingly going home the next day. She was the star patient. I will be going home with her just in case she needs someone. Interesting how things reverse at a certain point in life. I figure she wiped my behind and wore the beautimous macaroni necklaces I crafted for her so being there for her is the least I can do. Of course she didn't tell me until I was grown that once I was out of sight she stashed the pasta in her purse. Wish I had known that before I paraded all over town with the one Delaney gave me!! It did come in handy when I ran short of noodles one night.

Proud of Evans High School band's support of Haley Van Pelt. She is the Greenbrier High student and marching band section leader who had a wreck during band camp in July. Evans' band members will be wearing gold and green ribbons to honor Haley. When G'brier marches, during practices and games, they leave Haley's space open. Our prayers are that she will soon take her place back on the field.

Got to pack for Mama's. If you are a blog follower, please uplift her in your prayers tomorrow.

Love to all y'all

A Mama that Prays

Tuesday, August 25, 2009 was my mama's 81st birthday. It has become a joke between us that I tell her "I sure am glad you were born or I wouldn't be here." She always says she's glad she was born so she could be a mama to my sisters and me. And on my birthday I tell her "I sure am glad you decided to have me and didn't turn back when you found out it was me!" Mama always replies that she is sure glad she had me, too. Of course I don't do anything the easy way; Mama spent 4 days in the hospital waiting for my slow tail to get in gear and get going. Being the tail-end of the cow comes very naturally for me; unfortunately, that not only speaks to me taking my time but also to the truth that I have been known to show my bee-hind at times. Must have been all those folks literally waiting on me because I've loved attention ever since!

My mama prayed for me in the womb. She prayed over my childhood illnesses and offered praise for my health. Mama prayed for my education and grades, fair weather friends who were fated to disappoint me, and boys not worthy of my heart. She asked God to prepare Christian spouses for my sisters and me. Mama prayed that she and Daddy were raising us to know Jesus; that my sisters and me would grow up to always be close. She and Daddy said, repeatedly, "Stick together, stick together, stick together. When the rest of the world falls away, the Lord and your family will be left." They were absolutely right!

Mama has always been bold in her faith, too. With humble beginnings at age 12, she would ask neighbors for rides to church; her own parents rarely attended and seldom drove her. She married into a family of strong Christians and her faith continued to blossom. Mama moved to strange cities with her Navy husband, having to raise babies while far from her own mother. Mama lost four babies but still wanted to try for a big family and trusted God to give it to her; He did. Mama has that "Southern thang" going for her that allows her to easily strike up a conversation with anyone, anywhere, about seemingly anything. (A topic for another blog!) Mama has witnessed to store clerks, waitresses, pharmacists, doctors, janitors - you name it, she's asked them the most important question one could ask, simply, "do you know Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Savior?" I'm ashamed to admit it used to embarrass me. Then it shamed me to realize I felt that way. Finally I grew to admire her.

In my twenties, I was devastated to learn that I had endometriosis and that I had almost no chance of bearing a child. I had always wanted to be a mommy; had grown up babysitting, working in VBS and the nursery and taught preschool Sunday School. My mama literally, and figuratively, put her foot down and refused to let me give up. She never, never gave up hope that I would receive the desire of my heart - a baby. I always saw her never-give-up attitude when it came to the underdogs and hopeless situations of the world. I watched her sit by my uncle's bedside for 39 days, praying and waiting for him to wake up after major heart surgery. (So serious that the procedures used made medical history). Mama pushed my aunt, she pushed her nieces - she even pushed the medical staff with her prayerful, faithful belief in a miracle. We got one when Uncle Archie woke up on day 40! I wanted to doubt that God would give me a miracle but with "Dot" pushing me, I didn't dare. I think I was more scared of her reaction to any sign of my doubt than I was of God's!!

When a test result showed markers for cervical cancer, I was at my lowest point. The first call I made was to Mama. In her typical fashion she replied, "It will be okay, sugah. God has a plan for you. I know He will give you a child." My mind was screaming, "What? Are you kiddin' me, woman? Either you took one too many pills today or you skipped one!!" But because I didn't want to be disrespectful and I value my teeth, I just cried and let her pray me through it. One month later I tested positive - for pregnancy. Nine months later as Delaney's delivery began to become a life-threatening situation for both of us, there Mama & Daddy were; by my bedside they prayed aloud for us, for the medical personnel, for my husband. We will celebrate our still-healthy baby girl's 16th birthday next month, praise God!

There were times while I was rebelling that I put my parents through hell. If you had looked up the word "hellion" in Webster's during that time, my picture would have been scowling back at you. My daddy and I were at each other constantly, like two tom cats with their tails tied together and Mama was the lion tamer (or tom cat tamer, as it were). I finally smartened up, got right with my Savior, and daddy and I were very close right up until his death; Mama and I remain close. I have asked her many times why she didn't just pinch my head off or put me in a sack and throw me in the Savannah River; off the Butt Bridge would have been appropriate had it been deep enough! She always gives the same two-part answer: "I stood upon the Word in Proverbs 22:8 - 'Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it.'; and, a mother never gives up on her child." Please help me to be that kind of mama to Delaney, the baby my mama knew was coming; she knew that she knew that she knew. Thank you, Lord, for never giving up on me and for choosing a praying Mama for me!

Happy Birthday, Mama! I sure am glad you were born.

Love, Hope

Love to all y'all!

God is in my School

Yesterday was another day full of praise, worship and fellowship. I love my church family. When I worship at Grace, when I'm truly seeking the face of God, I can feel His presence in such a mighty and real way. My words are insufficient to describe the fullness of the Holy Spirit I can feel well up inside of me. Pastor Bill is a wonderful shepherd to his flock and a great facilitator who strives to bring us ever closer to our Savior and each other. I also had an opportunity to sub in the nursery. Met someone new, Leysl - not new to Grace but when you attend a large church sometimes you miss meeting folks. So happy to work with her and one of my moms from last year, Melissa. Nothing like wiping hind parts and snotty noses to bond women together! That's the stuff that breaks down walls, honey! It's hard not to be "real" when you're up to your elbows in poo.

Melissa's daughter, Tori, was in my class last year and now attends a public school kindergarten. Tori came home from school mid-way through last week and told her mama that "God is not at my school!" She went on to share her observation - and exasperation - that she was waiting for her teacher or someone to talk about God but... God was not at her school! Out of the mouths of babes! Tori also said she missed "Mr. Chris" and chapel time with him. Melissa explained to Tori that we carry God with us wherever we go and, because there are places where lessons/discussions about God don't take place, it's important that we stay close to Him and keep Him with us. It was a privilege to teach Tori and to know that she does recognize the difference when God is not in school. It also makes me sad. My Scout struggled to bring God with her to school and was bullied about her faith, her membership in a Christian club at Greenbrier Middle, and even about her Christian t-shirts. Adults are not the only targets of unbelievers and we could certainly learn from the strong faith of Tori and Scout. Glory to God, Scout had Christian teachers giving her encouragement. How blessed I am to be a preschool teacher at Grace and to have God in my school! I also know beyond a shadow of a doubt that Christian teachers work at public schools and they share their faith every day. I pray that God provides them the protection and strength they need to continue to do so.

Randomness...cooked more of Grandmother Lottie's tea cakes for my family. There is just great satisfaction for me in making something that pleases my family. I know, how sick IS that?! Seriously, I love that my daughter calls me "the MacGyver of the Kitchen." She says I could take any random ingredients and make a delicious meal. Wow, maybe I could get a paying gig doing that!! Scout was so happy she came in my room and hugged my neck so tight. Yay...a voluntary teenager hug!!! My sweet hubby is working this evening. Praying he has a slow night; a busy night for a paramedic business means there are folks out there suffering. Thank you, Lord, for our public servants and please surround them with angels and keep them safe.

Now I must go before I fall down. And if you haven't guessed it yet...God is in my home, too!

Love to all y'all

Jesus and Disco

What a great time I had tonight! Several of our Sunday School classes joined in and had a "Disco Night" tonight in the youth suite. The decorating committee did an outstanding job of transforming the suite and cafe' into a groovy, happenin' hang-out; completing the look were the expected disco balls and other shiny stuff but unexpected items from the era like: real record albums by Neil Diamond, KC and the Sunshine band, etc., a "Mrs Beasley" doll like Buffy from Family Affair owned, a "Captain Caveman" doll, and other iconic memorabilia. The buffet included fondue pots including cheese, caramel and peanut butter dips. It was really like stepping back in time. The ensembles that people sported were a cross between hip, hilarious and completely accurate! There was so much polyester and hairspray I was looking for a fire extinguisher just in case any of us got to close to the flames from the fondue warmers and candles! With all the flammable fabric, wigs and glitter the fumes would've gotten us before the flames stood a chance, honey!!

Tonight was yet again proof that a group of adults can get together, have a great time and not have to be plowed, stoned, high or insert the euphemism of your choice describing a non-sober state of being. Being a Christian does not mean being devoid of humor, fun, hijinks and good-hearted mischief. We didn't sit around holding hands and singing hymns but I believe God was glorified by our fellowship and our care for each other. We had a ball playing stuff like Family Feud and just hanging out.

There was a little bittersweetness in my walk down memory lane tonight. I wish I could say that the first time I listened to disco, danced the hustle and wore polyester (though I was in high school) that I was walking strong in the Lord. I was not. I knew all the right "churchy words" because I was raised in a Christian home. But I was leading a double life. Until the end of the '80's I tried to fill the God-shaped hole in my life with everything but Him; partying was all I lived for - thinking about the last good time and planning the next one. My only future plans were planning the outfits I'd wear during those good times. Only by the grace of God did I not suffer long-term effects because that lifestyle is how addictions and other great burdens begin. One day I just woke up being sick and tired of being sick and tired. All I had been taught about God's unconditional love and grace still didn't prepare me for the feeling that I needed to "clean up" before I could come back to Him. But Paul, the prodigal son, and the woman at the well became my touchstones. If God could use them, maybe He could use a broken vessel like me. For the first time I came to truly embrace the truth that Jesus will meet you where He finds you but He won't leave you there. How blessed I am that Jesus loves a former disco diva like me!!

Love to all y'all!

Digging for Joy and other random thoughts

Joy is a choice; happiness is a reaction based upon circumstances. I truly, sincerely, purpose in my heart to look for and choose joy every day. It's not always easy; like Kermit said, "It ain't easy bein' green." Today is one of the days when I have trouble "bein' green" and have to dig for the joy. My fibromyalgia (a non-contagious, auto-immune disease) is doing it's full-on best to kick my bee-hind. Crampy hands and feet, feel like I've run 20 miles, neck glands swollen and pressing on a facial nerve causing severe pain in my jaw. Just want to lay in bed but I'll never get this day back! I physically cannot do laundry or complete the needed decorating, etc resulting from our recent move. So I'm piled up in my quilt, watching the Law & Order:Criminal Intent marathon (LOVE Vincent D'Onofrio) while I work on lesson plans and put ice on my jaw. Whatever works, right?! Found some joy!

Choosing joy... I know my daughter is safe and we're not frantically hanging posters, lighting up Amber Alert billboards and praying for her safe return. My husband is at work and will come home and take care of me; he's not gambling or in a hotel with a girlfriend or scoring drugs. I have fresh water flowing from my faucets, at will, and not toting it from a river 5 miles away, boiling it first so my family doesn't get dysentery. I can kneel on my porch if I choose - in full view of my neighbors- and pray to my heavenly Father, without fear of men with automatic weapons nearby ready to send me to meet Him. I can even wear stripes and plaids, with a polka-dot shower cap, and the only consequence is my daughter pointing and laughing! More joy, yesss! Thank you, Lord, for the things I sometimes take for granted.

Choosing joy...a family friend had a baby Tuesday. I can understand how one can look around at the streets, see what humans can do to one another and not believe in my loving God. But how can you look at a baby and not believe? There is a brand, spankin' new human where one did not exist 9 months ago! A baby like no other that has ever been created or ever will be created; the fingerprints of God cover Baby Rivers and every other human. It's what we do with the mold He created that counts. (And on days like today, I think there's mold ON my mold!) Baby Rivers' fingerprints are not only unique from any other person, each of the 10 prints are unique from each other. And that is supposed to be derived from some ancient ball of gas tumbling through the universe? Really?! Come on, I also figured out the lady at the magic show ain't really being cut in half, either. Reading Lee Strobel's The Case for Christ truly helped me with the science and history aspect of my witness. Welcome to the world, Rivers. More joy for me! Thank you, Lord, for the every day miracles that surround us.

The fibromyalgia has made it increasingly harder for me to write for long periods of time. Love journaling but was basically grinding to a halt. What to do? I thought blogging was for full-time and freelance writers; didn't realize, duh, that it is whatever you want it to be. Read the blogs of Kristen Davis and Julie Dennard and they inspired me. Inexplicably, typing is more comfortable so I could journal in the form of a blog just as they do. I may be a bit slow on the uptake but I eventually catch on. Now one of my bestest friends, Mickie, a writer with her own weekly column, has begun reading my blog and loves it. She even asked to quote/borrow from it. Wow, high praise coming from someone whom I greatly admire; a true daughter of the South and an extraordinary wordsmith. Yep, found some more joy! Thank you, Lord, for sending these women to inspire me.

Scout is home from school and now piled up on the bed next to me. A teenager not only speaking to her mother, but hanging out with her. Do signs and wonders never cease?! Oops, is that more joy coming my way? I do believe it is. Thank you, Lord, for challenging me to choose joy!

Love to all y'all!

Don't pay the ransom, I've escaped! I not only just made it through the first week of school, I thrived and so did my munchkins. We have such a sweet class; lots of personalities emerging as they feel more comfortable in their new room. Of course some came in with no apprehension and some are ready to take over! It will be interesting with a 2-to-1 ratio of girls to boys. Guess it will help them get used to taking orders from us who really rule the world :) Already had one diva trying to get her pal to wear a princess gown and needless to say, he was not having it! She even tried the reassurance ploy, "but you would wook so bootiful!" No sale!

My own precious daughter is flaked out on the bed next to me. High school is tough but she's tougher...as long as she gets an evening nap. She is poisonous without enough sleep. Have you seen how fast a frog zaps a bug into its mouth? That's how fast she'll snap up her daddy, me or any human in the vicinity when she is in "tyrannical teen" mode. We just try not to make any sudden moves. Love that she still creeps in here for after-school talks. I take the crumbs and eventually am able to make a meal and understand what's going on in her world. Considering what a Christ-centered young woman she is, I'll take a little sleep-deprivation reactive disorder. How do y'all like that fancy diagnosis? I stayed at a Holiday Inn Express and watched reruns of House last night!

My beloved hubby is home on a rare evening off so I'm off to enjoy marital bliss. Love to all y'all!

Hello Y'all

Posting on Facebook has been fun and I have received positive feedback on my postings. I enjoy journaling and have done it for years. My daddy graduated from UGA with a journalism degree and my mama has been journaling for years (she's good for an alibi if necessary) so it obviously comes naturally. This may turn out to be purely for me but so what? My motto "No shame in my game" gives me the push I need sometimes to try new things or just to ask nunya questions. (FYI, "Nunya" means "none ya' bidness"). Explaining nunya puts me in mind of the comments from my friends and friends of friends who aren't from around here who appreciate my explanations of the nuances of Southern-ese. Careful with the smart jokes and comments folks; remember, God talks like we do! Check in for more from me - "I am fearfully and wonderfully made..."(Psalm 139:14)